Do you want to be oppressed?
Do you want a right to the anger which consumes you, a way to allay your guilt for feeling it, and a target on which to unleash it?
Are you searching for a purpose — a cause you can give your whole self to? Do you want to be a part of something bigger?
This is your chance to join the conversation — to speak out, and be heard! Sign up now and you’ll instantly have something to talk about!
We guarantee you a new experience, an identity, and an escape. Just follow these simple steps and you too can be oppressed, it’s that easy!
Step 1: Choosing Your Oppressors
Your oppressors are all around, once you know how to look, however, choosing the right oppressors can be tricky, so it’s important to consider these factors when doing so:
If you answered yes to any or all of these questions you may want to reconsider. There’s a spectrum of oppression ranging from mild feelings of injustice to full-on physical violence, so keep that in mind when making your choice. It might be better to go with a group who seem more like a minor annoyance than a major threat, that way you can continue living as you normally would while still managing to feel marginalised.
Another important factor to note is the identity of the oppressors themselves — don’t worry about being too specific with your choice — in fact, it’s generally better to leave it a little vague. That way you won’t have any problem finding your oppressors, or even completely redefining them, while still holding on to your core values* and sense of oppression.
Step 2: Reaching Out
Now that you’re oppressed it’s time to find some kindred spirits. Generally, your rhetorical brothers in hypothetical arms will be hiding in plain sight. They could be neighbours, coworkers, or even close friends. For fear of further persecution you may not be able to outright claim your oppression, so to find allies you’ll need to make some sort of indirect signal to let them know that you, too, are oppressed. This could be a subtle expression made during a conversation about a certain subject, or maybe even just mentioning a controversial topic and seeing how others around you react.
Once you’ve identified some like minded individuals, try to get them alone so you can reveal your true identity Be careful not to mention it too freely though — don’t forget, you’re oppressed now, and the general public are just waiting to pounce.
If you can’t find any confidants in your area, it’s time to widen your search. The Internet — also known as the “World Wide Web” — is a vital tool for finding and growing a community. There’s always a place “online” for people like you to speak out, and be heard — and if there isn’t, why not make one? You might be the revolutionary spark that ignites the flames of change. You might also make some neat new friends.
Step 3: Living as an Oppressed Person
Living as an oppressed person has its challenges. You will constantly have to bite your tongue, you’ll have to interact with people you find unsavoury, you may even have to exchange pleasantries with your oppressors. You’ll often be outnumbered, outgunned (figuratively), and out-reasoned, inundated by your oppressor’s opposing opinions, and forced to suffer their ignorance without recourse. Of course you’ll want to retaliate; to challenge their views and speak your truth, but this is ill advised — if you initiate a discourse in the wrong environment you could be publicly shamed, or worse yet, made to question your own ideals.
Facing these indignities will be without question the most difficult part of your new life, but it’s essential — these constant affronts will hone your spirit, fuelling the fire that burns within and cementing your notion that everyone is out to get you. These tribulations also highlight the importance of building a strong network of allies: people in whom you can confide and who’ll unquestioningly support your worldview, like buttresses on a tower, each strengthening your foundation, leaving you unshakable.
Step 4: Coming Out
Once you’ve completed the previous steps, and you feel that entering the public sphere will have little to no negative impact on your life, you’ll be ready to take your fight from the message boards to the streets. Entering the public-forum can be daunting, but if you push past the trepidation it can also be a lot of fun. As always, there’s power in numbers, so it’s best to make your debut amid a large group. You could organise a get-together, maybe in the form of a protest or counter-protest, or even a parade, as long as it’s somewhere you feel safe. Then, surrounded by your new friends, you can relax into your true identity and show the world who you really are. Meet-ups are a great way to boost the confidence of yourself and others, and — if your group is enthusiastic enough — you might even encourage others to join you.
Once you’ve attended a few get-togethers and feel secure in the knowledge that your cause is righteous you can begin to challenge people on their views openly. They may still try and shame you, or use logic to confuse you, but with your newfound confidence and sheer determination you can fight back, and maybe even win! Just remember: never doubt yourself, never compromise, and never back down.
Step 5: Don’t Stop Believing
As your group grows it may start to seem like you are, in fact, the majority. There may come a point when you begin to wonder if you are still oppressed, or if you were, in fact, ever oppressed. You may even wonder whether you’ve become the oppressor, or if you always were… There’s no easy answers to these questions so it’s generally better to ignore them — times may change, but that doesn’t mean you have to.